Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Horror Film Reviews

Again with the horror movies? Well, yes. But this is a good thing. I am about to bestow upon you a gift culled from my many years of slogging through truly god-awful films. Following is a list of very good horror movies you've probably never heard of. Trust me, give 'em a try.

Shutter (2004): This is the original Thai version (shut up and deal with the subtitles). You will jump out of your skin at least once (guaranteed) and be utterly creeped out by the ending. Love this one.  Rating:  5 out of 5

Baghead (2008): Super low-budget quickie that surprised the hell out of me. A new twist on the friends-stuck-in-a-cabin-in-the-woods-while-being-stalked-by-a-killer story. You'll think you know what's going on. You don't.  Rating:  4 out of 5

Automaton Transfusion (2006): Weirdest name for a zombie flick I've ever heard. The story isn't anything new, but it's fast, frantic, and full of excellent gore. The people who made this are true fans of the genre. It does leave you hanging a little, but the sequel is out this year.  Rating:  4 out of 5

Dog Soldiers (2002): British horror yarn about a group of soldiers on maneuvers in a remote forest. Predictably, they find themselves hunted by something. What that something is and how it came to be there is the unpredictable part. The humor was also a surprise. This film's a lot of fun.  Rating:  4 out of 5

Mum & Dad (2008): Another Brit flick, this one's pretty disturbing. A family lives next to Heathrow airport and has a tendency to lure its young workers to their house where bad things are done to them. The disturbing part was the active participation of the whole family. The ending makes the sick trip worth it, though.  Rating:  3 out of 5

Feast (2005): Think Tremors on crystal-meth. Disparate group of folks holed up in a desert tavern fending off some very nasty critters. This movie does not follow the rules...and revels in it. What other movie gleefully kills off the hero in the first five minutes? A word of warning, though: avoid the sequels like they were smallpox.  Rating:  4 out of 5

Bubba Ho-tep (2002): The strangest premise for a horror movie, ever. Normally, I'd just need to say is that it stars Bruce Campbell. That would be enough. Well...he plays an elderly Elvis living in a nursing home with JFK and takes it upon himself to defend it from an, um, evil mummy. Not weird enough? Here you go - Ossie Davis plays JFK.  Rating:  4 out of 5

Below (2002): How many haunted house movies have you seen that take place on a submarine? Exactly. It's very well done and spooky as hell.  Rating:  4 out of 5

Dead Birds(2004): Another high concept film. Civil War-era bank robbers hide out in a secluded (and abandoned) mansion. Creepiness ensues. The ending will leave you either scratching your head or completely freaked out.  Rating:  3 out of 5

Deathwatch (2002): Jamie Bell from Billy Elliot stars in this one about a group of soldiers in WWI who get trapped behind the lines in German trenches. And then begin to die one by one. I don't think it's a spoiler to say the killer isn't exactly alive. It's grimy, smoky, and bloody well done.  Rating:  4 out of 5

So there you go. Enjoy these and then thank me later. If you have any suggestions for me, please share.

No comments:

Post a Comment