Horror Film Review

Growth (2009): A group of friends travel to a remote house in the woods...Sound familiar? Yes, but not in a good way. I have no idea what writer/director Gabriel Cowan was trying to do with this film. Whatever it was, it didn't work. Think Slither but without the humor, pacing, acting, or special effects.

We are shown the backstory via the opening credits and honestly, I would have preferred to see a film made about that. Scientists ran an island 20 years ago where they discovered a parasite that makes men into super men. It all went horribly wrong, of course, and the little slug-like critters wound up turning the infected people into violent nutjobs. Now, the niece of the head scientist returns to the island to take care of some legal/real estate matters. And she just happens to bring along her sexy best friend, her sexy brother-in-law, and her sexy boyfriend.  I'm not going to go any further into the story because it's boring and even worse, predictable.

Breakdown

Acting:  Weird. I can't really explain it. They're not awful, but they're not right either.
Story:  See above.
Direction:  The biggest problem with the film is...that...it's...so...freaking...slow. So the trouble is with the story and the direction. That means you, Mr. Cowan. If he would have knocked 20 minutes off, it might have been a passable horror flick. Well, no, probably not. But it would have been better.
Production Values:  Lots of exterior shots temper the low-budget feel.
Gore/FX:  What there is, and it's not much, is fine (there is a pretty good scene where a guy gets his arm ripped off).
Ending:  One of those nihilistic ones that so pisses me off. I've discovered a trend in horror and it is this: the worse the movie, the more depressing and fatalistic the ending. Take I Sell the Dead or the aforementioned Slither. Very good films with very good endings.
The Verdict:  So should you watch it? Well, Christopher Shand who plays Justin has his shirt off a lot. That's about the only reason I can think of why you would. My advice? Go watch Slither again.

My Rating:  2 out of 5